I'm glad girls dont get visible erections
But, it would have made life so much easier...
we were playing true or dare on a webcam chat and i was way to drunk ...i ended up having to drink my own piss outta a beer bottle, life couldnt get any worse right now
you were chalanging people to drink the "worlds biggest jager bomb" - a VASE of Redbull and a PINT of Jager... is it no wonder you dont remember anything?
she was using a pencil to fish crushed adderall out of a plastic bag. it was like a college version of fun dip
I just texted him to come over because I want to see if his hand fits the handprint bruise on my ass.....I feel like the cinderella of S&M
I'm going to knit you a pair of furry handcuffs. And you said that knitting class was dumb.
All I've consumed over the last couple days is Vanilla Coke, semen, and Coors. I don't think today will be any different.
What's the protocol when you drive the girl's head into the wall during sex and she starts to cry?
just to let you know its hard to talk to your father while being fingered up against a car..
life lesson #151: dont let people go batshit crazy and stab you in the knee
i will live by this rule
I'm excited I love mornings when I'm not sober
He just compared our sex to a grand slam on Wii fitness
You're doing it right
I forgot a room to the key..so whenever you wake ip and read this...I'm sleeping inthe hallway..please find me
BITCH IT IS YOUR BIRTHDAY AND I'M STARTING ON A FISHBOWL OF LIQUOR WITHOUT YOU
I read that out. Group response is "Katie is hard as fuck."
WITH MOTHERFUCKING MONKEY MITTENS
I'm either hallucinating or there is a dying cat outside my apartment....
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