i wish semen tasted like chocolate
random question: do you know anywhere in the tri-state that has elephant racing? this is a work related question.
Wella between the drunkards, the inevitable slutty costumes, and someone doing a BODY SHOT OFF A PREGNANT GIRL, i lost my halloween spirit. Bah humbug.
Were taking tot shots. If toddlers could drink these are the size of shots they would take
seriously considering responding to a craigslist ad for a lesbian cunninlingus instructor...at this point i'm so desperate for a job that i'm willing to switch teams.
You were carrying around a milk crate, randomly putting it down calling out 'praise be to the milk gods' and making people pray to it.
I was tackling you out of excitement
Yeah thank goodness the stripper pole was there to break my fall.
Responsible roommate: 1. Someone who takes a huge shit at work so as not to clog the toilet at home.
I saw this news story about two naked Satanists being arrested so I thought I should ask if you need bail money or pants
Yes, if by 'finishing my business' you mean vomiting in her bathtub and losing my watch.
Sorry your girlfriend got you a valentines present and you forgot to get her one.
How long will your dick be dry?
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
Humming the Indiana Jones theme song as my hand makes its way to his dick.
Question: anytime during the past week did I drunk dial you and give you full permission to grab my boobs? Cus I know I said it I just don't remember who I said it to...
you bounced a quarter off my butt and it came back hitting you in the eye. karma, bitch.
Randomize
