yo - did your mom get a boob job (I think she did)
I haven't been able to trust a girl since spanks came out
he took off his pants and apologized in advance if I thought he was too small.
She made a list of the things each of us had done wrong and assigned a point system. Guess who came out the loser?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And "sexual slave/chef" was as it turns out not a real career choice...
could you please explain to me why my jumper cables are on my bedroom floor?
She was humming during sex. After I asked her why, she said it was her sex theme music
She asked if I could convince him so shave that shit off his face so he'll have a snowball's chance in hell of getting laid.
I'm a college student and my dad gets more ass than I do..... do you see a problem here?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nope I went the fuck home like an adult
Shaving your bikini line at 11 at night in the Walmart bathroom feels trashy no matter why you're doing it.
This wouldn't be the first time my boss has seen me topless
Nothing like sunday church bells to aid your walk to the pharmacy to get plan b
You know it's a bad cold when sneezing feels better than orgasming...
All I know is when I asked you how many fingers I was holding up, you said "Hippo"
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