i cant believe jose lima did steroids
apparently the kind that make you shitty at baseball
yah I made NO friends last night. at one point i think i replaced talking with spitting
Learn some fucking English or leave me alone! "Your" is for something that belongs to you, like 'your herpes'. And "you're" is a contraction for "you are", like "you're not sleeping with me".
i just jacked off to lindsey vonn, i feel so patriotic
USA! USA! USA!
He's 11. You dont draw dicks on 11 year olds, i dont care if he ate your lasagna
Just hooked up with a girl I met in line at Taco Bell. I told you leave me to do my own thing and I'll get it in
I'm allowed to be upset. I've never had that many fingers in my ass
I feel like I'm full of double a batteries and cocaine.
New wedding record, my shirt was off by 8pm!!!
Please write a memoir and name it "Game Boy and Dick Stuff"
Watched an eagle swoop down and eat a rabbit on my walk back from your place, literally too high to handle this right now
I don't have the resources to adequately explain this. I need like a Powerpoint presentation and also Vodka.
I just want him to hold me after a bad midterm. Is that even too much to ask for after sleeping with him twice?
andy told me i got kicked out of the bar and was so drunk i forgot and got back in line. the bouncer was zero impressed
Don't send me pics of cunning dicks while I'm eating potato chips
Randomize
