Watching intervention at a bar. Who let this happen??
apparently i found nail polish and started playing a game i made up called "paint a nail, do a shot"
its 4am and she invited me over to split a 'romantic bowl of frosted flakes'...really dude?...what do you think she's trying to say?...she better not be kidding about the frosted flakes though.
We found a stripper pole in your closet. It seemed like a good idea. Alex will fix the hole in your wall. Sorry.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Thanks, college. Tonight's decisions brought to you by margs in a nalgene.
You were running around yelling "BUKAKE!" and squirting people with a shampoo bottle you found. Total shitshow.
Just found a condom on my floor from last weekend. 2/2. The scavenger hunt is over.
I AM CRUING IT IS 93:2 AM AND I AM CYGIN INT BED
We were hunting our best friend with a BB gun in the backyard. I'd say the vaporizer was a worthy investment at this point.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was going to make you have an awkward boner around all your coworkers but then I fell asleep.
I'm listening to Michael Jackson while drinking vodka, alone. Honestly, l wish I could Moonwalk my way back to when I knew wtf was going on in my life.
Pretty sure I love my nipple piercing more than I'll love my children someday
I choose my mates solely based on size and ability. No cuddles. No sleep overs. Definitely no repeats.
besides the unzipped fly, the black eye and the toilet paper on your shoe you looked really sexy today baby!
Just made my first drink, took 2 sips feel like god
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