you were convinced campus grass and foliage would give you your daily serving of vegetables to balance out the amount of alcohol you drank.
This got awkward about two "Oh yeah"s ago.
Would it be cruel if i sold xanax instead of adderall to freshman unfamiliar to the drug-taking profession?
I have come to the conclusion that if you don't fulfill your life ambitions you should go into porn
with your flexibility, and the size of my penis, amazing things are possible.
We have video of him nailing the sex doll to my wall and putting all the monopoly pieces in her nose
he ran through my sliding door
in his defense that door gets complicated after 10 beers
This wedding is gonna be a disaster. I already had to turn down one of the groomsmen who offered me $100 to sleep with him next wknd.
Too low?
Yes.
I don't remember much but I think I'm wearing your underwear, and for that, I am extremely grateful.
I woke up in my own bed clutching a key to a Ramada in another state.
there's a girl on facebook trying to buy me a pizza. I can't say no... right?
It's gay softball weekend. Lots of hot gay strangers to go home with.
I see your boobs were ready to greet the new year.
Marrying her is the worst scenario of any. That includes death and zombies.
Attention, i sprayed windex on me to disguise the scent of sex and regret off my clothes from last night
Randomize
