I wanna bring you to show and tell
sometimes i think life is slapping me across the face and laughing, saying "ha ha! you're an adult!"
oh and if she happens to say anything about a cantalope and tissues... just go with it
I'd like to personally thank you for not letting anyone puke in any of the salad bowls this time
Bring it all. We will have a potluck of drugs. It will be magical.
There is literally a guy in my class with a gallon of water and a trophy.
I'm just saying, margarita tuesday would turn anyone gay.
She said she'd heard about my nickname in high school. Apparently sledgehammer isn't as popular as you'd believe...
His new girl is probably classy and boring. I bet she doesn't feed him sour patch kids while she wiggles his weiner.
You may have gone on a date, but I ate chicken nuggets shaped like dinosaurs for dinner tonight. I think we both know who the real winner is here.
That's a beautiful sentiment.
Whoever was doing lines off my iPad is a dick. Also bring Gatorade, for I hunger
For Who flesh?
I love everything about him! His penis, his hair, his tattoos, his penis, his cat, his penis.
I'm driving to his house to eat chicken and hopefully have an orgasm
When my parents ask, do you think "he was the cop I gave head to in order to get out of a speeding ticket" will suffice as to how we met?
ya figured it'd be nice to explore the mythical world of sober sex i've heard so much about
i've often wondered how it works
Randomize
