"Is there dairy in semen?" was in her recent google searches...so she's lactose intolerant AND a slut.
Halloween 2010: the NuvaRing girls. You're Thursday. We'll walk into the party chanting "Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday, Sunday, Everydaaay".
No period for spring break; use this wisely.
He wants to know how I lost my bra in his pants....id like to know too
Did you pour a hundred fucking pounds of sand in my car last night?
lol... you weighed it?
Some random at the bar just whispered in my ear that he wants to eat me out while on bath salts....
I was walking around the party holding a dog on my shoulder like it was a parrot
Sorry about coming to the pool in only a thong. I thought you said it was closed. Not that you were teaching a group of kids how to swim.
Yea... The gym isn't gunna happen today... When I was drunk last night I tried to prove I could front flip off the wheel cover of a semi... I fucked up my shoulder pretty bad... It was more of a roll
At least is you came to Milwaukee to visit me you'd get the best mind blowing sex of your life and free wifi. Who doesn't want free wifi!
Dunno. My heart says "no", my brain says "maybe" and my dick says "YES YES FOR THE LOVE OF GOD YES!!"
I had sex with a mask on because I have the flu and I didn't want to get him sick.
i just want things to go smoothly
oh they won't lmao
Last night I ate a candle out of a strippers ass.... I guess it was an okay night.
Whose the chick running for dorm president promising bigger dicks and softer toilet paper? That’s who I m voting for
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