you probably should not have drank the wine that everyone spits out. and the sad part, that was not even your low point last night
is drinking for groundhog day legit?
well you blacked out on MLK day and we pregamed arbor day, so yes
I woke up next to her this morning and couldn't remember her name. Luckily, she had written it on my hand so that I could add her on facebook.
..i think i can hear you losing your virginity
We had a 30 min conversation last night about whether or not to bone that girl with a lisp to see if she moans with one...
I just took my birth control with a water bottle I found in my purse with vodka in it in Spanish class. 10am is still too early for me.
I rammed pretzels and Jell-O shots down the throats of those I loved.
i think i just encouraged him to glue googly eyes to my boobs
Theyll love you, its bunch of older ladies who drink whisky and sours and talk about the sex seans in Game of Throwns
All I've done today is make sangria and wonder what the hell I'm doing with my life.
Well its all fun and games until you get naked with your ex in the shower. that's NOT flirting
I just had a twenty minute discussion about endangered breed dog breeding with an Extremely drunk guy
So many questions...
No one needs to know about the barren wasteland that is my vag. Sometimes i visualize my cervix rocking back and forth wondering where everybody went.
I just pictured that. It's reading a book.
And if you haven't kicked a pigeon you haven't started your morning right
All you have to drink is moonshine and ranch. This is bullshit.
Magyver!
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