On imdb the canadians say It's amazing
I just got asked by a man in the alley if i would like to buy 50 dollars of meat for 20 bucks. Its been a weird day.
the police officer looked at my vomit and told me "milk was a bad choice"
she is using a fork to eat popcorn and refuses to drink gatorade out of anything but a margarita glass... did i mention the popcorn is on a plate?
I knew he was a nice guy, because when we switched positions he flipped the mattress so I wouldn't have to lay in a pool of his sweat.
i dont care. it has been a 14 hour day, and we are all celebrating by alternating shots and grilled cheese.
Don't upload the drink o meter to your google calendar. Somehow binge drinking looks even worse with a time stamp.
About six hours after the bottle of smirnoff, I was googling "losing your stomach lining" and calling my mom for help. She has experience.
Just pulled back my covers. Jizz. Jizz everywhere. Hipster jizz everywhere on my only set of sheets.
I'm so glad I got to use the word gutterslut before 11:00a today.
I legit just woke up on my couch, snuggled up next to some guy who's wearing my roommate's pink bathroble. What the fuck do they put in those shots?
I need a Xanax. A Veggie Delight. And exhibition style sex.
I think I just smoked a piece of your foot. Were u picking your feet by the weed?
Oh dude I know. When something that's supposed stop pregnancies taste like chocolate something's up
Finally liberated my Star Trek DVD from my booty call's house. Captain Kirk would be so proud.
Randomize