The new Black Eyed Peas song is the stupidest shit I've heard since the last Black Eyed Peas song.
i just got so high i needed a buddy system to the kitchen
1 in 5 deaths i nrussia is alcohol related. GO MOTHERLAND
I'm soaked in beer, and I think blood. Why did we think we could tap a keg with a hammer?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So I'm at that stage in my life where I am stalking my stalker just to get laid
Jelly. This is your "are you still alive" text. Any response will do.
Hey I found a cat!
Sarah's knitting me a hat as an apology for unknowingly making out with my boyfriend
I love it when he cheats on me with nice people
Reasons why I'm always right: I am older, I am wiser, I have a larger penis
Does being an adult mean drunkenly signing for your tax return from a foreign country? If so, I've reached adulthood.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Cant leave im designed bacon maker you come here
Come on, will you just fuck him so we can watch Star Wars.
You would think by the size of the lump on my ass that I would have remembered falling down a flight of stairs.
You do it and I'll burn these mermaid pants so help me God.
idk what happened last night but i just wokeup with nothing on but a necklace...what is this, the fucking titanic?
Went to my bottom drawer for my stash , gone just a note says thanks sucker love dad
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