Is that you in the white hat?
Fine suit yourself
Down for casual relationships, more fun than catholic missionary, bring condoms and don't get attached.
If I remember correctly, I may have been smoking a cigarette on the dance floor. This is the true sign of a douchebag in his native habitat...fmylife
I wish there were whore gnomes that cleaned our apartment when we were gone.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Since she's grinding up on your thigh right now, I'm sending you this text hoping it makes your phone vibrate in her vagina
Just witnessed a walk of shame by a guy in a half gorilla suit. It's going to be a good day.
After this weekend, it looks come this holiday season I'll be walking in a winter abortionland.
I just had sex with the megalodon show on in the background and it was just as magical as it sounds
We were having a serious discussion about Blue's Clues and I just kept thinking, 'you've seen me naked'.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am seriously only coming over if there are McNuggets. I want 10 bitch. Honey mustard.
I just ordered $70 worth of pizza and I'm not even ashamed. Happy Valentine's Day to me.
Yeah but him not going to be sleeping in your sink this time.
Can someone explain to me why guys are so fascinated w their dicks that they feel like they'll die if they don't send unsolicited dick pics
No, I'm not a weirdo, I keep bondage straps under my matress like a normal person, not a diary.
I was left to my own devices with nothing to do but drink
Randomize