He famously once noted that women should wear white "like all other domestic appliances,"
I think, one-on-one, Paul Rudd could be very threatening in like a REALLY good way.
this girl ate taco bell on my bed naked last night, it was the sexiest thing ive ever seen
I just won Halloween Walk of Shame Bingo!
No. I was horrified and confused as to why you thought scrambled eggs and cottage cheese was a good mix
Woke up and went out for a cigarette and it was dead quiet. It was like the world just knew how many mistakes were made last night.
Let's drink?
Just because it's bacon vodka doesn't mean it's for breakfast.
I'm done being subtle here. MOVE INTO MY EXTRA BEDROOM SO WE CAN FUCK WHENEVER AND NOT HAVE TO WORRY ABOUT FINDING PEOPLE TO HAVE CASUAL SEX WITH.
you live like 200 miles from me and I have two years of school left
goddamnit stop pointing out all the flaws in my plan
Got hit on by the cable guy. Solid 9. Think Orlando Bloom with a glorious curly mullet.
last night we were hooking up when all the sudden he just murmured "mm blonde". i don't know what to think about this situation.
So the dog chewed my vibrator last night. It added a nice new texture actually.
I feel bad cuz I was his ride home, but I didn't know I was going to have a religious experience with a guy in a cookie monster t-shirt. You can't plan for that shit.
The more time I spend surrounded by Mormons, the more I miss alcohol.
My mom is worried I'm not eating enough protein so she's sending me 48 cans of tuna. That's not a typo.
I just saw a guy faceplant off a unicycle while holding a saxophone, while his buddy riding another unicycle and sporting a flute rode by laughing
Only at UConn...
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