you just love her because she lets you bang her with fruits and veggies!
we're all still whores. we just have a theme song now.
Had sex to a Lionel Richie song. I have a feeling I was conceived to it. Finally reached full circle.
Theres just something about looking at pictures of your dick in church that doesn't feel right
It took him longer to remove his skinny jeans than it did for him to finish. I didn't even have time to realize it sucked until it was already over.
He's currently rapping every word to 'more money more problems' at what could be a over 30s gay bar. I'm not sure yet. More info to come.
apparently it's a turnoff if you ask a guy why he thinks he needs to use magnums
At least you have booty calls.
True. I just waste them though. I feel like I need to be told "there are people in this world who would give anything for just one and you have two." You know in that same tone your parents told you about the starving people in china
Well five day drinking adventure in appreciation of cinco de drinko under the belt, great way to start may
I can't believe he just friend zoned me like that.
Dude, you're not even gay.
Listen it's no longer the walk of shame to class when ur leaving the frat house and the brothers ask "when are coming back home"
I can't believe you won 5 grand from the casio last night and spent more than 80% on tacobell and strippers already
He was basically a horny puppy - following me around all night and kept sticking his hand down my pants.
Sorry I've been a slutty nightmare this week
Just got a handjob in my psych lecture. You were right, going to class is paying off.
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