I was in a gas station that sold tazers and I just saw a billboard that said "Strippers, need we say more?" God I love Georgia!
is it bad that while shopping i looked specifically for clothes that hold their form after taking them off and putting them on again and again?
Slut skills are useful in every country.
today he pulled me aside to show me a lawn mower that he drew above his pubes. I saw his pubes in all their glory. Right there. In spanish class. Hola.
how do I tell him nicely and in french that we can't have sex anymore because his huge penis will ruin me for other french men?
As a jewish boy dating her she thinks everypart of christmas is my first time. Helllllo bj under mistletoe!!
I just ate a dove chocolate and the wrapper said "chocolate: always your valentine" WHAT KIND OF JACKASS WRITES THESE AND WHY MUST THEY MOCK ME?
The only thing he had going for him was mad fingering skills. the ONLY thing. crayons have a wider circumference.
I just gave a bum a ride back to his bench. Columbus is weird but I like it.
BING! You are now free to move about my panties. He just left for work.
Last night you snap chatted some chick a pic of bottle service with the caption "send tits"
I woke up to find I still had sequins under my tits. I'd say Sunday was a success.
I feel a blackout coming on
Plz don't have me burst into your house saying you're late for re airport to rescue you from a fat girl again
That was 2 times
I dont pretend to understand how the heterosexual mind works. Its a mysterious cavern of stupidity and disgusting sexual acts.
I'm not saying it wasn't great. I'm just saying sleeping with a gassy, depressed,45 year old mother was a different experience. Would do it again though.
Randomize
