Why do girls always cry at the bar?
What's the point of going out if you're going to cry all night?
Are they having an exestensial crisis at the bar?
I woke up this morning in your mom's car... any ideas?
at church Sunday morning I dropped an M&M down my dress and it landed in my bra. I fished it out and ate it. A lot of people saw me.
He ate me out. It was like watching him trying to win a pie eating contest
not my fault. i got her to believe he wrote an oasis song. he still managed to find a way to make sure no girl ever gets near his penis.
Going to eat lunch. Bunch of people in church clothes, and we are hungover, wearing pajamas, and in real danger of puking on the floor. We're about to destroy the ambience of this joint.
His whole family saw that I had cum in my hair once they turned on the blacklight at the bowling alley. You should have seen his mother's face.
the weed was in a baggy that had little penguins on it. i am so excited you have no idea
Nada. Shooting off confetti and wanted to see I'd u could see it from ur house.
Wow. Its not even 11am.
Does the phrase 'traumatizing near-threesome' mean anything to you.
Cause a man that looks THAT good must have an ass that tastes like lucky charms
Ahh, 151. Think of it this way: it took one shot to get you buzzed, I took eight. I may or may not have broken a tv with my skull that night and met someone's parents naked and hungover the next morning.
Tonight I researched being a phone sex operator and teaching English at a French school in Africa. I think my future lacks direction
Anyone who can sit 4 hours in a doobie circle with their feet in a kiddie pool is ok by me
Yeah, everything was going great until the mugging.
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