had no condoms so I just made do with an empty doritos bag.
Deadliest Catch is NOT foreplay
told my boyfriend i was a virgin so he wouldnt feel bad since he is. now hes asking why his dick is so itchy. should i tell him why?
i don't see why you should, it's not like you told the other guys with the itchy dicks.
some girl that im facebook friends with has H1N1, im scared to even go to her facebook page
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just took a celebratory "i havent slept with anyone in this bar" shot. yesssss....
Just got Netflix. Dexter Marathon. Still in my PJ's. Only eaten cookie dough and drinking a 40. I have never reeked so strongly of lonely .
i wish you were under my bed. you sexy russian fur trapper.
please. text the right number. youve been sending me these all night.
You insisted on going outside so you could "breathe real air".
Going to a professional golf course at 2am to throw the flag poles like javelins
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just remembered that i did pull ups in a bikini on the porch of Red Lobster last night. someone needs to stage an intervention
He was eating my ass and came up for air, I almost choked laughing because he had a toilet paper cling on stuck in his mustache
Sorry for trying to baptize you last night
You knew the entire thing in Latin I was so impressed
how do you feel about japanese?
I would eat half a street meat hotdog I found on the sidewalk, I'm good with anything.
He keeps singing a song about someone called the dayman.
....fighter of the Nightman?
Its like my group of friends and I are all dating and we're all just a bunch of Swingers, is that normal?
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