she's walking down the hall in a thong and one flip flop and one ugg
So i know you wont get this until you land, but if i'm late its cause i was having sex. being blunt and hope that explains things.
Girl your like that last load of laundry... I'll do you eventually just not tonight.
I vaguely remember telling a bum she was worth more than this
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
THE BIG GAY MAD HATTER IS HERE AND HE HAS DRUGS IN HIS PANTS FOR YOU. COME DOWNSTAIRS BITCHEZZZZ
Please tell me you've ingested more than weed and Oreos today
I thought i lost my bra, but when i went back to help clean it was hanging up on the wall
Every time he asks me if I'm horny I'm just like come on...stupid question
The guy behind me is talking about how his life goal is to use his knowledge of mathematics to make the world a better place. My only life goal right now is getting through this lecture without throwing up in my lap.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just bought a gingerbread house kit and pregnancy tests. Happy holidays.
I'm mainly pissed because I shaved fucking EVERYTHING for this. WITH SHAVING CREAM. Men do not appreciate how rarely that happens.
i cant believe the cop was fine with you saying no we are in a hurry when he asked to search your car
I have to lie to someone and move five gallons of fermenting alcohol across campus but after that i'll hit you up 4 sho
Your dick. My mouth. We have 20 minutes.
LOOK AT HOW SMOOTH THIS BITCH IS
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