end the night at a gay bar...not sure how...but why the fuck do i have two condoms in my pocket?
TXT her NOW! The phone is actually IN her Va-Jay-Jay!!
i would have smoked before this dance, how ever i have surgery Monday and I looked up weed and anesthesia and fatalities was mentioned, so i decided that it would be a bad idea
probs a good idea
i like the whole idea of life and being alive
you sure you're not high?
You told me alcohol would be the death of you then ordered 10 shots of tequila.
i dont even know how to be here
I just had my first experience getting hit on by a guy. It was really awkward, he touched my chest and invited me to a gay bar because "women get drunk and let their guard down at gay bars"
thats actually pretty good logic
I take back everything I said about communal showers
They're here. One showed up as a slutty Crayola, and I think the other came as The Fat Friend.
well if I unknowingly shoved my hand up someones ass, I'm glad it was yours
andd if someone unknowingly shoved their hand up my ass without me knowing, im glad it was you
Make this decision based on your love for dick - NOT based on the fact that its probably one of the worst things you've ever thought of doing
There's a homeless man outside the bar. I have a toothbrush and toothpaste in my car. I think i'm going to give them to him. And they said drinking is bad.
You're so thoughtful.
Oh it's not a problem. Cleaning up the yard and disposing of 75 gallons of Jello is all I've got to look forward to today.
I just saw a guy in a hazmat suit riding a tractor.
I'm just concerned as to why his penis is two different colors.
I'll be an awkward "I've had the grooms penis in my mouth" presence and we can party our nipples off.
Randomize
