This girl is more easily done than said...
the guy in front of me just bought a pound of bacon, a bouquet, and a case of budlight, i want to see THAT makeup sex
the non-midget kid sent 8,000 texts in a month. the midget parents are pissed. THIS IS EPIC WHEN YOUR HIGH.
Chicago was legit, ate some badass pizza and gave a cig to a crackhead..its all i thought it would be
She liked every single Facebook status in her newsfeed and then made her status 'I LIKE U GUYS'
i've officially fucked a sailor, a policeman and a biker. I've never noticed my Village People fetish until now...
I just realized that two weekends in a row we ended up in a bathroom with two different boys asking us for a threesome. does this happen to everyone?
I can't believe you broke a Paula dean wooden spoon over my ass
Tonight will bring shame to my future grandchildren.
Dude, jerking off when you're all hopped up on pre workout energy supplements has got to be the greatest thing I've ever done.
Just beer bonged tequila, broke into the hotel next door and got chased by security. It's spring break
I want to tell you your future: you're going to be having sex
just turned another straight guy gay. Goddamn the church must hate me
Shit happens dude.
Shit doesn't just HAPPEN on the kitchen floor you asshole.
I texted him: “Come over for the Super Bowl. I promise lots of scoring.”
My divorce is turning into a porn script
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