found a dugout with weed in it in dad's car. decided to top up the weed compartment with salvia. for fun.
did you violate me with a mr sketch marker when i passed out? i just peed and wiped purple and it smelled like grape. i need to get to the bottom of this...
He choked me out. i woke up to poo. I dont think i like S&M
she insisted i was the anonymous guy on formspring that kept asking to bang her
Clearly I went along with it
The 9th floor RA wants to know why we stacked 21 cinder blocks in the shower, and I can't remember. Do you?
Puuuub goooolf. Being trashed at 830 never felt so right
Dude what hole are you on?....and its 9:15
hole5. 2 under par. irish nachos
If you wake up soonish don't worry. I took your dog to burger king and now we're going to see some nice girls.
I blacked out after you got about 8 goldfish out of the tank and put them in your pockets. We're not allowed back. It was a sucky Walmart anyway...
I talk a lot when I drink rum. he was going down on me and i was telling him how i wished i could tap dance. oh god
I had an epiphany. If a dude dressed up as Batman to ask me out, I'd prolly marry him.
sexting while watching Peter Pan the Musical! something just doesn't seem right here
I don't fucking know. He perched his parrot on his dick. I left after that.
I'm going to smell of sex and shame.
How is that different than any other Monday night?
I swear to God...this day is one great big who's who in the land of fucked uppedness.
Oh god, I forgot we had sex to Elton John
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