He kissed a someone with a penis
4 feet of snow. teaching the cats how to snow swim. throwing them off the porch and seeing what happens.
Just saw the first guy i ever slept with in drag. I can hear my grandfather saying "i knew she was a lesbian" somewhere
i wish the dell website had a "did you drink an entire bottle of rum and stepped on your laptop which shattered the screen this weekend and would like to know how to fix it without your parents finding out FAST?" link on their homepage.. i can't be the only one
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Do you remember calling yourself Captain Cockblock and openly giving out everyones sexual history? Because you did.
I just woke up to pictures of every angle of his dick I'll ever need to see.
I would lick a homeless mans crack teeth for a cup of coffee right now.
Wear whatever you want, I'm wearing ass-less chaps and a sombrero
I shit you not ... they just advertised a recruiting service for strippers at this concert.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've shit my pants 4 times in 12 hours... Never trust a fart when u pass 30
The upside of a losing football weekend is that there are more sad frat boys willing to let loose their inner gay man.
I'm so lazy and tired i just want to cry and fall asleep in a bed of egg mcmuffins.
Is it against health code to come into work half drunk and commando?
Imma do four shots of whisky within two minutes and pass out. Otherwise this'll go badly.
Thanks again for the coffee and orgasms
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