My ass is singing 4 different tunes right about now... Taco Bell was a bad idea!
He wanted to take me out and said we could "go huntin in the woods."
Brandy, I need a picture of your boobs. Not time to explain.
New moon trailer came on. Theater booed. I love these people.
Soo I have a handle of 100 proof captain, cupcakes, and nothing to get up for in the morning.. This blizzard is shaping up to be a great night.
oh yeah I know that guy. he's legit. slept in my closet a few times
Thanks for making breakfast. I usually have cereal and coffee...but i think margaritas and turkey sandwiches could catch on.
I never thought to pass out in a hotel lobby rather then paying for a hotel room until you taught me that's acceptable at the Hilton
The good news is the house is clean, the bad news is someone redecorated the bonus room by spray painting "free willy" on the wall in honor of the girl who passed out in there last night.
I refuse to fuck a guy who needs a coozy for his beer. NOT EVEN IN DESPERATE TIMES LIKE THESE.
Am I really that girl who walks around half naked wearing a cowboy hat begging for liquor at some random guys house
So when I walked out, everyone was chanting ONE OF US, someone draped a lei over my head, and then she grabbed my ass and dragged me back into the bedroom. I'd say it was a pretty good night to lose my virginity.
Hey do you or anyone you know want to get drunk for free? At 4pm tonight at rctc for field sobriety training for future cops
My throat is burning
Thats because you proceeded to drink the salsa because you thought it was alcohol...dumbass
You left me a really long voicemail saying, "Hey, it's meeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee." and then the rest is just loud laughter
Randomize
