I'm peeing chunks and puking liquid. Did I at least have fun last night?
when I scratched it gently some sort of watery looking stuff came out...so then I just stopped thinknig about it.
theres a middle aged lesbian couple holding hands on the bus and a 17 or 18 year old christian girl visibly staring freaked out and audibly praying about it
Can I sleep on your couch? My wife just found my eHarmony account.
We almost died tonight..we almost die every night. but tonight was the closest by far
im kinda looking forward to winter break. ive been away from home for so long i think i can trick my vagina into thinking that these arent the same people ive been hooking up with since high school...
Hurricane Sex Time is the only thing iv said since it started.
i've eaten like 19 popsicles... what the fuck have you done today?
8:30 every morning in the third floor bathroom we fuck in the handicap stall. You have your morning workout and I have mine.
I may not have eyeballs after all the drunk naked people having sex outside.
I woke up to a shot of jager next to my face. I felt bad for it so i drank it
Idk who invented dominoes cheese steak pizza but I wanna lick their balls
She brought over her portable harddrive and we dueled with porn. This relationship is too beautiful to last.
I took a picture of you last night while you were drunk, trying to smoke a bowl through your nose. It's now your contact id.
So you can now add nose to my list of places that cum has gone that it shouldn't...
Randomize