fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
i really wish james franco would like my vagina
We were making out and then he stopped and said to me, "Your ship is right there, why don't you take your people and just go?"
just caught a 10 year old kid staring at my dick next to me in the urinal. i just nodded to him and said yeah, mines bigger little dude. i gotta stop drinking in public....
Half my make-up was stuck to his thigh where I'd fallen asleep after the blowjob.
I just got this text "hi this is Julie, I met you last night in the bathroom. You asked me to text you and remind you that you ate an entire lime, because you figured your sober self in the morning would be confused."
I smell like I just crawled out of a bottle of champagne and landed on the floor of taco bueno.
That place is a DUI and an STD waiting to happen. I think I'll pass.
How do you feel? I threw up in a towel. Also, a lot of other things.
Happy Birthday. May your liver respect you, fat bitches neglect you, hangovers reject you, and AA accept you.
I just faked an orgasm while masturbating. Idk what exactly my problem is but I have one
Oh like it's the first time I've had a bowl of wine
He came on my favorite pants. He is dead to me.
His name was toto. That should have been my red flag
is it bad that I'm more worried about having to take out my piercings than the fact that I might be having a kid
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