oh good, I think they're gone
the painters?
my herpes
Steve is enlightening me on how and why u put gerbils up your ass
This girls' body was nothing short of spectacular...her face, was like the '09 Detroit Lions
I am tired of kissing girls with mustaches.
woke up with the bag of wine duct taped to my shoulder.
Just crossed the line from casual pregrame to public intoxication. Shotgunning in a bus shelter.
My drug dealer is making me hot tea during the snowstorm...I'm a fan.
In a shocking revelation, I learned that the Easter Sunday shit show happened not because of vodka but because my gay neighbor drugged me.
I JUST FOUND AN INTERNATIONAL POLE DANCING CHAMPIONSHIP IN SPANISH
Honest opinion...too aggressive to bring the funnel out to the bar? Also just so you know im at the bar. with the funnel.
I'm not sure drinking my way through west nile virus is the best idea. Oh well, already committed to that plan.
A BJ like that needs to be recommended.
HOW THE FUCK IS IT POSSIBLE THAT THE JUNIOR HIGH STUDENT IS BETTER AT BEING AN ADULT THAN I AM!?!?
I threw my shoes out of frustration and walked home barefoot... can you help me find my shoes in the morning
New rock bottom. Woke up at 7 am fully clothed in a bathtub full of water. I hate myself.
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