But, the reference to being horny and then blending a banana is troubling
I then asked the hardee's employee: mam, do you mind if i pay 75 cents in cash and then put the 1.13 on my debit card.
OMFG, I'm seriously about to get fairly unpolite with this guy.
Wow. I bet he's shakin' in his boots.
I wish life was like the Sims. Right when you're pregnant the music would play and I would just know instead of agonizing for the next two weeks.
It's not called being bisexual its called making out with anyone that has a mouth
i just threw up in the porta potty. i am in no condition to be guarding anyone's life rite now.
cracked out the beer snorkel again. that thing has a five for five record of getting me naked.
Challenge: Try to have your balls hanging out in every picture you take tonight
Challenge Accepted
His reasoning for leaving the keys in the ignition of my car overnight with the top down in an open parking lot ? Too eager to have sex. The sex was not that good for him to do this twice....
Mate, you pissed in my bed. Then told me to "Just keep swimming"
Guess who just bought an ounce of pot via Paypal, and paid for it with my airline Visa card to earn miles?
Congratulations. That business degree is finally worth every penny it cost you.
extra points if i make kids and or the elderly cry
YOU ARE STRONGER THAN YOUR VAGINA
He just sprayed AXE in his mouth to get rid of his bad breath... THAT DRUNK
I've started recycling nudes. Why should I take new pictures for every single man?
Randomize
