god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
is it wrong that i woudl like to tie u down to the baby changing station using the straps provided?
okay, this is the fifth time he asked if it was in yet. maybe i shouldn't have dated a blind guy.
Minivans at bars can only lead to bad things.
My number went up to seventeen today. I forgot to add my random hookup on a sailboat.
Did he make you just lay your head next to his cock and talk to it again?
Just realized how many men I've had sex with for the first time in St. Patty's Day past. Currently sending "HAPPY SEXIVERSARY" texts...
Dude their dog does tricks for sips of beer. He keeps going up next to people and trying to shake. This is awesome.
As i lay in bed, clutching my face, i'm starting to believe your dick in my eye story.
I swear god is testing me by giving me awesome guys with tiny penises
Idk I was embarrassed that I hit it too hard so I played it off by spitting out bong water like a 'whales blowhole'
that is either the most profound and meaningful thing i've ever heard, or someone got high before noon again.
I just used a box o wine to refill a bottle o wine to more effectively drunk clean
I WANT TO JUMP IN TO A VOLCANO
She got a boob job, dumped her husband, became a stripper, got a DUI in her Porsche and is now dating her lawyer
I’m making her my life coach if med school doesn’t work out
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