so then you didnt wanna fuck tonight right?
oops, you werent supposed to get that until you left.
Me. At least after what I've been through.
he only lasted three minutes, so to spite him i stayed the night and slept in.
did the walk of shame from ex-boyfriend's room only to find other ex-boyfriend sitting in the living room. some people shouldn't be allowed to be friends.
some people shouldn't be allowed to be desperate.
I dunno... she just cried a lot and I kept sighing.
Yea...but the guy who is beating me has a ponytail. So actually, I'm the winner here.
Did you ever feel like going into a planned parenthood and performing an abortion in front of them?
Umm..who the fuck is this?
Oh shit
my ex just saw me in his brothers bed. fuck yes revenge feels good
Bisexual Viking-cowboy hybrid is at the bar again
Dibsssss
Besides the flaccid incident, it was decent. Average sized. So this is my life now. Loneliness and lackluster sex.
I unknowingly motorboated my boyfriend's ex-gf last night. Yay me!
This guy kept trying to use "see? I'm clean. Cleared by the plasma place today." as a pick up line. This is not okay.
i’m just listening to christina aguilera’s “your body” on repeat and trying not to pass out at my desk.
I just woke up drenched in beer, in a puddle of beer, and cuddling a bottle of tequila
I'd say I was is in rare form last night but it's becoming pretty common.
Randomize
