come over anyways, right now, right this second
it can be a super quick quicky, then you can go back to studying
wow, that sounds SO fun, please stop enticing me with premature ejaculation
I would drag my balls through a mile of broken glass to eat pudding out of her anus
Dude I'm telling you, conditioner is the best for jerking it in the shower. It feels great and afterwards everything is all smooth
He tagged himself in all of my pictures so he would get a notification if someone commented on it.
Restraining orders are what college is about.
the amount of blow i got, New years should last a week.
He screamed "Oh boy! Oh boy!" during climax.
you went around the entire night in your french maid costume dusting off the "cob webs" on everyone's crotch saying "you havent gotten any action in a while"
I was wondering why i got so many friend requests the next day...
our new exchange student wants to hear all about America's greatest politician, "Oprah." it's gonna be a long fucking day
I thought his dick was headless. then I pulled back the foreskin.
Sex-sore abs and my workout pants have gravel stains on the knees. It's like the workout of shame.
He said he wanted to "superfuck" me
Does he wear a cape??
Napping in front of family members can be embarrassing when you get a christmas boner in your sleep
We just stood outside and debated the existence of mermaids for about 20 min. Is this what too drunk is?
I've been with my family a total of 20 minutes and I'm ready to go on a bender. This is going to be a long weekend.
Now all my porn is stored in my parents’ basement. It’s like a part of my soul is boxed up
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