I think I just saw someone hide a body.
Cuntadactyl. (n). A pre-historic dinosaur of Mandy-like features that is primarily identified by it's inability to play well with others and overall C-word demeanor. Physically, an unfortunate appearance.
My mom said "I don't want to fund your drug problem" so she gave me a gift card to the book store. I now have a 420 page book on growing weed.
Will you be topless? That will affect my answer.
Jon thought he was that blonde chick from Three's Company when he was shrooming
Fell down a spiral staircase. Et tu vodka. Et tu.
i know you're upset so i should probs be supportive but i've got nothing in that department. your life suuuuucks
the bar didnt serve shots so jim ordered us jaeger neat. it worked.
at crossfit today a guy shit his pants while deadlifting 405 lbs. coach made fun of him then congratulated him on his new personal record.
No just a slight sexual miscommunication which led to a little (lot) vomiting by one party and a bruised sternum on the other party involved.
I can't even make a guess how that goes.
This means I've slept with 2 ppl that live in vans...my life is complete
i woke up in a bed of pop tarts
Does she know she is talking to people who slam shots of fireball and chase it with vodka?
Is it possible for mice to climb? If so I think mice are climbing into my bed in the night and playing with my hair..
she just punched him in the balls in front of everyone and yelled "YOU SEE WHAT YOU MADE ME DO"
Randomize
