That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
According to Glamour magazine, experiencing sexual pleasure helps you live longer. I am dying an early death.
Just drove through Taco Johns wearing a drug rug and no pants. When I rolled down my window, the girl paused for a minute before saying "um... 4.07"
I'm sorry. I know you didn't expect me to be arm deep in vagina when you walked through the door.
You are very nonchalant about the high probability of us having an orgy.
Eh, I'm ok with this, this can work. We're the best kind of the worst people.
allie, at least he made an effort and braided his goatee.
because drunk making out is frowned upon in museums i think
Life gets in the way of sexy Saturday sometimes
"can of pringles" is totally a legitimate measure of time
Nurse helped me count all my sexual partners and still gave me her phone number. She shall be #73.
You are the only lesbian I know that needs plan b
That is our entire relationship. We match bowls and give each other head. What more could you possibly want?
Thanks for not letting me choke to death on my vomit last night
Thank you for attempting to organize my DVDs in chronological and alphbetical order
You think you can just send me a picture of your dick and everything will be ok?
Yep.
My Mini-Van Handjob Milf is leaving the company. I need to find a new job. I can’t handle this place without those handjobs
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