mmm... i enjoy making beautiful women smile
I just took a girl with a hip brace and crutches on a date. she obviously can't bone. is it rude to demand a blowjob?
idk why but i just wanna to have sex with the idea of him. i don't even wanna meet him.
Did I get blown in the bathroom? Yes. Did she throw up cranberry juice on my shorts? Yes. Did she finish the job? Yes.
you told me your penis was albino and it couldnt be exposed to light so you needed to keep it in me
Like... Chilling at home with a movie, hang out? Or have sexual intercourse in the backseat if his car, hang out?
Iranian Rapper, camaroonian basketball player, mexican i forget and indian doctor....this one looks the best on paper.
There're making snowcones with the leftover vodka from last night. This is not the time to be making up excuses!
When i left he was drinking an entire pot of coffee out of the pot with a straw. It's safe to say he's using a personal day
He's claiming he can open a beer bottle with anything. He's been trying for a while now with a power rangers action figure and he is just cutting the hell out of his hand. There is blood all over billy
I guess I was blacked out I hopped a fence and hugged a cow that night.
look for me at the Giants game I will possibly be the drunk girl passed out by 2nd
You just kept looking down at your tits and screaming "I LOVE YOU TWO!!!"
I cannot pick him out of a line up. I remember he is blonde and his half flaccid dick looks like gonzo. So unless he pulls down his pants I don't know who he is
The kid with the ed hardy shirt put a bunch of random shit in the washer and turned it on. example: a hanger, the movie Chocolate with Johnny Depp, and your mom's cat
Randomize
