i hate when u poo a lot and when u wipe theres no poopy residue on the TP. it makes me feel like my butt hole is hiding something from me. just had 2tell sum1.
Stop. You don't mean that. Tequila might mean that. But you don't mean that.
dude we gotta go shopping. I made pancakes this afternoon and used them as sandwich bread.
I made popcorn. Partly so the room doesn't smell like sex, and partly to apologize for the things you saw when you walked in...
There's a paramedic out here, what have you done?
I'm on a mission. But just to make out with him so his relationship collapses and he is single when I come back in April.
Well for starters the people who just made my burger at the grab and go just told me to "hang in there"
She's dipping the chocolate graham crackers in marshmallow vodka for a 'campfire taste'
Is it bad to have a craving for speed? I feel like my nose is thirsty.
Think of all the island guys I could have. Ah well.
You can not bait me into a "how Stella got her groove back" call and response.
Then years and years after that I will send you a picture of my warped vagina from all the kids that I had.
We've been staking out a taco bell for 2 hours trying to find last night's one night stand
I genuinely attribute some of my blowjob skills to playing saxophone in highschool
I mean I'd assume the strange looks are on account of the fact that I'd imagine people normally don't stink of booze on an 8:14am flight.
One day no one will want to send me dick pics so by all means keep 'em coming
Randomize
