Well how sick are u. Ive got a good immune system.
I kissed a girl and did not like it. Now I hate Katy Perry even more.
Contrary to popular belief, while 19 is an attractive age, it does not equate to sexual prowess.
He told me he wouldn't do any drunk sluts but me. I guess that's sort of a compliment...?
She's never allowed to turn 21 again
Just made nachos out of string cheese and sunchips and laying in my bed watching babay einstion..get on my level
Your cum is still running out of me. I pity the next person that tries these jeans on....
Went home drunk last night and peed on my Christmas tree, my mothers going to fucking kill me
You can't start the super bowl without starting a kitchen fire making cole slaw. Its unamerican.
I don't even want to know
No, we will not be going out tonight. We are trying to grow the toy donkey in whiskey rather than water. Serious fucking science. Have fun at the boring bar while we Bill Nye it up in this bitch.
I'd recommend you leave that level of crazy to the experts. I'd start with an under appreciated soccer mom if I were you.
Btw... when someone is licking your balls, "yeah... that's not the worst thing in the world" is not an appropriate compliment/thank you.
if it doesnt flame it aint got game is a bad drinking motto eyebrow-wise.
eyebrows regrow, your balls dont
We're going to brunch on Super Bowl Sunday. I am not a smart man.
I just made myself 3 peanut butter sammies because I was too hungry to watch porn
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