No, drunk sperm still make babies.
My vagina is so ashamed right now. It won't even look at me.
my roommate's gf just broke up with him and hes in his room crying and listening to coldplay while beating off to pictures of her...
and then he said that the only reasonable explanation as to why I got swine flu was because all I ever do is join the bandwagon
she went to pee and i could hear her singing "Drip Drip Drop LIttle April Showers" from Bambi through the door.
I FINALLY HAVE A REASON TO DYE MY PUBES BLUE!!!
He's German, so by default he gets to fuck me.
I'm playing drinking games with a boy who looks like Liam Hemsworth. I think I'm fine.
The last two times I had sex with him I forgot who it was half way through
Remember when I got punched in the face on NYE last year? I don't
I buy a new bowl every time I get a new guy. It's retail therapy.
I'm worried about us. We are almost 30 and we still drink jaeger bombs till we black out. Wait, no I'm not. I'm excited about us.
Bug bite on my vagina. I think we need to stop this 'sex in awesome places campaign.'
Apparently during my blackout I walked over to Troy, grabbed my crotch, and said “Eat Fresh” while his GF was with him. FML
I forgot to bring soap and all I could find here was body wash. It's like bathing with laundry detergent.
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