I wish they had a "No Yankees" filter on status updates.
This was all being yelled across a beer pong table as all important things should be discussed
Just signed my boyfriend up on a dating website so I could officially have a reason to leave him for my hot neighbor.
Standing in front of the open refrigerator with a 3/4 empty bottle of wine eating Bac-o's from the jar, topless. Somebody really should've taught me better coping skills.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Called my dealer in tears and we talked for an hour until I felt better. That's the way it should be.
I borrowed a glass of wine. And the bottle. Your cat said it was ok
I've slept in a different bed every day this week. Operation Ho Ho Ho is a success!
this is the first time i'm angry at someone with so much boobs. she like managed to break my glass and my phone with one glorious swing
Sounds good. Look at us. Planning sex like proper adults.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I will have to bone him sometime between now and July so he will move all my shit again
Do you have a moment to talk about our lord and savior, Kendra's boobs?
Soooooo I may or may not have accidentally been a catalyst in a destroyed marriage.
Is someone on their way here yet? I'm way too tweaked to be here alone
How did I end up in some random dudes car?
Some guy came up to you and asked if you knew how to drive stick.
kick those bitches in the teeth and tell them mama came to party
Randomize