Last night is one of those stories you hear about on 20/20 right after they make a law banning 90% if what I did.
Canada is now making docos about life in America. Its called Trailer Park Boys.
he kind of looks like leonardo dicaprio...in whats eating gilbert grape
wtf, did you fuck a retard?!
Honestly dude, i think you should ignore the restraining order if you really love her.
HAPPY NEWYEARSM FAGTRON! GETTING HEAD IN TAXI I WIN
I just took a dump to end all dumps. Other dumps have already written ballads about it. It was the Armageddon dump. Bruce Willis was there, it was awful.
The cleaning lady has moved my vibrator twice now so I would say I'm pretty ready to move out.
Single lady's Saturday night: eat doritos, masturbate, eat more doritos. Do shot of Jager. Repeat until desired result is achieved.
We almost got stabbed in the nuts last night. Don't worry, we're alright.
I can't. I mean he's hot, but there's really nothing else there
You just said he's hot
NO YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND
please tell dad to clear the porn off his tablet before he lends it to anyone from now on
Well the good news of being walked in on, my mom says your tits are pretty. Then she added that hers were like that once. Fml
See I just want a dick that I don`t have to deal with or talk to unless it is inside me. Is that so much to ask for?
He was actually surprised when I poured myself a glass full of straight vodka. Clearly he doesn't know me as well as he thinks.
I think my roomie is silently judging me for spraining my foot by having sex in a bounce house
so the bounce house and tequila was good idea then?
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