I'll collect that couch/porn sloopy beedge tomorrow just FYI
why is it that everytime a half black man enters something boring, it suddenly becomes sexy to people? golf? the presidency?
Seriously just heard: "we need some good ass wine. how bout this swa-vig-non blank"
hahahaha. Oh virginia: where the south begins
I think I have internal bruising from those poses we were doing last night. My own ribs hurt me. I don't understand.
He came out in cowboy boots and underpants holding a beer while he hugged my mom. I love Montana.
There's just something about a dollar tree pregnancy test that screams THIS WASNT PLANNED!
No no don't get confused. We do chemistry homework on Thursdays. We screw on Fridays. Other than that, Words With Friends is our only communication five days a week. We are NOT dating.
I want what they have, but in the meantime I have a whole bottle of rum to which I'm quite devoted
We pretended the crowd cheering the Thunder's win was cheering for us while we had sex on the couch.
If you value your immune system buddy, walk away from that one.
So you're mad that you saw a penis at a swinger's party? That's rational
as he was bent over the toilet, he turned to me and said "barbarian kyle is much stronger than regular kyle" and then went right back to puking.
Also, making a white Russian with butterscotch schnapps instead of vodka is probably the best decision I've made in my entire college career.
It was all fun and games until he noticed the hickey that he hadn't given me...
Ya i'm marrying the man who can hear/smell this level of flatulence and stick around
Randomize
