just wrote on a church. and then stalked a boy, by the way, i fucked him. him being your friend, also, love tacos.
Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
Don't feel obligated to get back to me but I think I just fell in love with a middle aged waitress at the Dennys in waco. She's used but in good condition.
From now on, just let me go home. I'm tired of hooking up with your roommates... Including you.
Nothing says true friendship like 2 people bonding over potentially having AIDS.
she just gave me a present from you... on a stripper pole. in front of the whole club. :)
WHY ISNT THIS A PICTURE MESSAGE
Jeff just maced a waitress...it's way too early for this.
its safe to say i can delete the contact in my phone "brandon random bus make out" from spring break right?
I'm also 3/4 on the frats. Its like my goal of traveling to all 7 continents, but different somehow and a lot less morally sound.
your ex girlfriend just barged in my house, drunk, mumbled something about "car strip", and put a huge hole in my drywall with her head.
I can always tell I missed tequila night based on the hickeys on your neck man. Fucking call me.
You rang?
Saw a ginger and the first thing I thought of doing was yelling "you have no soul!" so I called you so we can yell it together with you on speakerphone.
I am in his childhood bedroom and I feel like his trophies are applauding me and his stuffed bunny is disgusted with me. Did you know he was a mathlete?
Maybe life is about finding the person you DO want to cuddle with after they rail you like a porn star
You like pics of my balls that much?
I am at the store looking at frames as we text...
Randomize
