party started at 10. cops are coming to shut us down now and its 11. i already lostmy underwear and im wearing a sparkly thong on my haed. this has to be some kinda record.
I just had to explain to the pharmacy cashier that the Plan B and thank you notes I was buying were not related.
We should steal a little kid and go to Chucke Cheese
Don't judge me. Haven't eaten all day so I'm in my room sticking my finger in peanut butter, then jam, then my mouth.
yeah. pants. i need to put pants on. i didn't do that last night. big mistake
I'm in a trailer park. But I'm not scared. The virgin always lives.
oh dont worry, my liver will give out way before i get skin cancer
I am downstairs in the bar now having a beer...actually I ordered two beers and placed one across from me in front of an open chair. I did this for appearance sake, so nobody knew I was double fisting all alone. I'm getting hungry now. I'm thinking of ordering two meals just to keep appearances up.
I think I'm gonna quit partying for awhile. Piercing my own nose is where I draw the line.
Embrace your curves. Cuz we're too poor for a coke habit.
Friendly reminder that on the walk home you tripped but instead of falling to the sidewalk, you tried to save it and ended up headbutting my ex-boyfriend in the balls. ILU.
His dog was laying on the bed and he said we could have sex as long as we didn't disturb his dog. My life is pathetic
Excuse me while I take my birth control pill for today to prevent getting pregnant from hearing about your sex life
the next morning his mother came in to tell me that she made breakfast. she told me to put my clothes on too. awkward.
Cops swarmed my car last night in the walmart parking lot cause of the paper plate
Randomize