Did yall have sex?
Well we both woke up naked and there was a condom wrapper on the floor, but I don't remember so does that count?
Def not... that's how I managed to keep my number under 10 for all of college- If you don't remember, it didn't happen
Just figured out how to smoke weed with a toaster.
I don't think its a good idea if I moon a whole bar again
he yelled "RELEASE THE KRAKEN" then hit me with his dick
The crowning achievement of my weekend was hooking up with someone I'm at least facebook friends with.
Considering the last guy I had sex with was gay, this was a huge improvement.
Drunk me thinks I can light up a cig anywhere, sober me finds this hilarious and highly irresponsible. The grocery store is not a bar.
wtf are you talking about? You vomit-splattered the cop from the balcony. The cop YOU called because you drunk-dialed 911 because a 5 year old ate the last donut.
it was a krispy kreme
i would really love it if at least once per weekend i did not wake up to you half naked passed out on the floor
Just watched a guy ride a bike off his roof into his pool. On my way to the liquor store, picking you up in 20
I mean, as I was vomiting in front of a giant crucifix I became acutely aware of my poor choices
I feel like a girl who eats her problems away with fast food.
When all else fails, you can always look down at your enormous penis.
We've been staking out a taco bell for 2 hours trying to find last night's one night stand
There needs to be a greeting card for "I miss having sex and smoking weed with you."
What are u up to today?
Marathon sex and eating.
Randomize
