You know it's an interesting night when you drunkenly scream at your boss, "You'd make a HORRIBLE OBGYN!! You're hands are ENORMOUS!"
We're playing Big Buck Hunter to determine who buys the next pitchers. And they said video games wouldn't help me later in life
long story short: there's a file in the master file cabinet labeled "lube".
The amount of pregnancy tests I've taken in my life is unhealthy
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Do your friends by chance have our inflatable deer head?
Nevermind, it's in the dryer.
Getting stoned at work has never been a good idea, but im always more than willing to give it another chance
not now. havin a heart to heart with drunk fred flinstone
Dude there is a stripper at my door saying she has my birthday present. She knows my name...but it's not my birthday...
God works in mysterious ways my friend.
hoooly shit dude in taco costume challenged alpha douche to a fight. he's got catch phrases. come. now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm 50% sure my cousin put weed in these deviled eggs.
This day took a left turn at "This is your going away party, I got a bunch of blow."
Went to put my shoe on and asked myself why I left a sock in it. I didn't. Needless to say I found our used condom.
You fell asleep on the toilet and he was like uh should I take her off?
Had to walk of shame past Westminster Abbey this morning. Pretty sure a Japanese tourist took a photo of me.
I went to watch porn and there's already 3 Santa videos. Happy November 1st.
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