Just did shrooms. Don't feel shit! Wsasted 40 bucks on this! Nothing's happenig except for this little gnome on my shoulder and the couch is melting. Fuckin waste of money.
I have a story that starts with Nutella and ends with sex in the laundry building at RIT.
he was lying next to me and i saw him text "score" to someone.
when the lights went off, all i could see was the glowing of the camera light in the closet... i got the fuck out of there so fast.
eating taco bell the same day as formal = probably a bad idea
Why are you covered in frosting?
Friend's birthday situation turned into enlightened cake orgy.
Fyi: beer caps are stronger then bathroom counters
He equated my biology degree to a belief in Santa. I wonder if he heard the doors to my vagina clanging shut.
There should be a rule. If your dick is under 6 inches, you are not allowed to dress as Thor.
I would feel worse for you if you weren't waking up between a pair of double Fs that attached to a classically trained chief. Im still jacking off eating hot pockets.
My life is literally the worst. I was just laughing so hard at how hot they looked feeding each other the brownies and then I was like DON'T CRY
Roomie questionaires don't ask any of the important questions like "how do you feel about one night stands" and "will you judge me post-walk of shame"
I feel so bad for your roommate
I sat on my couch last night watching What Women Want, eating ice cream, and sobbing "why doesn't she like me?" Why was I born a man?
Just convinced the cute guy from class that I have prostate cancer. GET ME OUT OF THIS TOWN!
He was actually surprised when I poured myself a glass full of straight vodka. Clearly he doesn't know me as well as he thinks.
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