just tripped. bootyfest 2012 will be my engagement party. i saw the whole future. i'm moving to the beach.
Apparently I was holding on to a pizza crust for hours last night.
Did my good deed for the day.. Helped an old guy hide his beer on the NJ transit while the ticket lady came by
Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
things I never thought I would say vol. 24 "Bagpipes just remind me that my relationship is over"
I totally almost forgot you fucked that guy. St. Patty's bar crawls always have a drawback.
Apparently nick called me at 3 in the morning looking for you because you ate your keys and ran away..do I need to call an ambulance.
We played Rock Paper Scissors to see who would have to go down on the other person.
Throwing up into Nora's potty chair while simultaneously having beer shits was truly the highlight of my Christmas season.
Omg the world wants us to be better people
I refuse
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I opened my bookbag to put my laptop in and I found two granola bars and a pregnancy test. I am clearly prepared for life
Worse. He's Mormon. At least a gay guy will go get drinks with me.
Why is it that the asexual in our group is the one that gets laid the most often??
My disney ticket is covered in lube, do you think they will accept it?
I'm really stressed out right now.
I think you're confusing "stressed" and "sober".
I've been in town for almost 36 hrs and I haven't made out with a stranger yet - I consider THAT a record!
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