Sex has been so nonexistent lately that when I was masturbating the other day, I actually paused to yawn.
Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
I may or may not have slept in someones apt on your street because they told me I was fun sized like a mini snickers
Drunk in some girls audi what the fuck is happenin i love sb
it's ELEVEN
thirty
I didn't join FB to see my only child straddle that boy in all her pictures.
after you took your Demerol you started flying around and talking like the robot ship on the movie Stealth. then you licked my iPhone and declared the mission a success.
ok understand this, i didn't pay for your dinner bc you said i wasn't going to get a blowjob for at least a month... this isn't a mail-in rebate deal, you gotta pay upfront
You only like me because I'm a challenge
You already blew me
I am kinda proud of you, its like seeing my slutty baby take its first step
No one understands that once a girl pours a handle of smirnoff all over herself, clearly she is wasted
I feel like I ran a fucking marathon on my knees last night and there are bruises to prove it.
Haha! I've never met his girlfriend, so my main focus will be not saying,"you're the only person in this room that doesn't know what my vagina feels like."
Irrelevant. Does he have queso? That's the real question.
I walked into the living room this morning and he was there with 3 shots in a row. He said it was "tea time."
was his pinky out?
My body is telling me there was tequila. My pictures say it was Jeff's fault
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