Alcohol only hurts me because he loves me.
Apparently I called 911 everytime Sean Kingston told me to
my mouth is as dry as a post-menopausal camel on antidepressant's vagina.
I got up before the sun today. That makes me sun for the day.
When did you start smoking in order to be high by 4:30?
It wasn't like a party or anything. They played PlayStation and talked about sports. Then I threw up on his porch.
Wow I didn't even consider the possibility of him having ED. I'm gaining so many life experiences from dating an older man
If I had your job the next day id be on the news. And not the good news. Like fox & friends. Nancy grace would have my ass.
She walked out and announced that he was now part of our confused, incestuous, glorious eskimo family. I've never been more proud.
Campus is too small for this to keep happening
I appreciate alcohol much more now that I have to be sober sometimes
He's a doctor now.. hope he can cure his small dick
And all i could do was bury the part of me that felt guilty for cradle robbing and put on my dick swallowing bib.
is it bad that I see hot guys I wanna sleep with as challenges instead of actual people?
yes. but it works for you
I miss my innocence.
I miss being able to say, "I've never done this before."
He said my vagina smelled like pomegranates. Its like my vagina is the fountain of youth.
I was pretty sure he wouldn't be into me after I fucked his brother, and then his best friend, and yet, here I am doing lines off his stomach
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