I'M GETTING MARRIED!
YOU'RE STILL MARRIED!
During sex he wiggled his hips and said "I'm turning the ice cream" Deal breaker?
The lack of respect you have for your penis baffles me. I'd rather rub my ball sack on public toilet seats than stick my dick in some of those girls.
A simple 'no' would have sufficed
shes still asleep dad put a lobster in her bathroom
just tried googling 24 hr taco bell and when i typed "24 hour" it autocompleted with fitness. buzzzz killllll
I'm practically paying him in tacos to have sex with me.
Should I tell him the real reason I was in the hospital, or should I just keep him thinking the side effect he thought was in for was allergy related, not I just miscarried the child I didn't know we were having?
DONT LET HIM GET NAKED. JUST SAY NO
Sorry about the flaming shit on your door
I never thought I'd be in my late 20s and send that text
I just want my paycheck, and my friends. And alcohol and tacos. Is that so much to ask?
Can you masturbate to someone liking your instagram picture?
If you binge watch Bill Nye Saves the World without me you can consider yourself single
ICE CREAM AND CAKE BITCHESSSSSS
Just found out the last guy I hooked up with is being held in a federal prison under suspicion of stealing 175k.
I'm naked and there are two trees and a yield sign
Be right there
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