I swear if she hugs me I'm going to bleach my body
the next morning i told him i was impressed that he remembered my name. he said it wasn't that hard when "tracy
my mom just asked me about sexting and if I have ever sent a naked picture to anyone. i fucking hate fox news.
He warned me he may piss the bed. I'm oddly okay with this.
He tried to cuddle with me after we hooked up and i just looked at him and said why are you still here?
there is beer in every square inch of this apartment and he hasn't even lived in it for 24 hours. we're playing some game that involves slamming beer, beer pong and smacking people's cups out of their hands.
Cookies. Watch out fir falling satellites.
To be so small, the mini-horses are exceptionally aggressive. And fast. Very, very fast.
Abort! Abort! He almost bit off a finger!
Fried chicken is a must. Do strippers eat fried chicken or should I plan on something else?
he forgot we were at my place and not his so he tried kicking me out of my own apartment by saying "so, you can go whenever you want...."
These are all good points. But, I think your under estimating what it's like to be held upside down for a standing 69
Dude. Steinbecking. It's when you double-fist coffee and alcohol to help you meet a writing deadline.
New rule. If he's too busy to put the "H" in "what" then I'm too busy to put his D in me.
And when were you going to tell me to stop dancing on his coffee table singing "come on irene?"
Who knew removing piercings would be so radical?
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