I saw a chick at 8 am this morning walking back to my dorm wearing wings... I'm kind of jealous.
totally poinked my lawyers daughter in his hot tub last night. i figure getting off is just compensation for not getting me off.
No period for spring break; use this wisely.
I just texted him to come over because I want to see if his hand fits the handprint bruise on my ass.....I feel like the cinderella of S&M
I feel like a need a fire hose to wash off what I did last night
He took me to the bathroom in the gay bar to "just cuddle." Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice...well...
I think we can all look back on last night and categorize it under, " reason why Cory can't be left at the bar by himself"
There are fucking limits. Jerking another guy off in the bar toes the line.
Morning yack off the fire escape. Girl walking by was mortified. Gooooooooo Ducks!!
I want to be you.
She just kept introducing me to people by telling them which of their friends I've fucked
There is naked swordfighting and something green and alcoholic going on in the basement. COME. OVER. NOW.
Cocaine and dance dance revolution for 4 hours. I consider last night a success.
Leave it to you to bring a trash can into a fist fight.
I'm going to reward myself for having sex with coffee and a breakfast burrito.
I'm at the store buying a new phone cause I pissed all over mine last night. Drunk me is expensive as shit.
Randomize
